Tangled Threads and Seaweed

Zzzzzzz

Just when I think I'm getting my strength back, I've had to take a nap the last two days. I'd really like to be getting back to work pretty soon, but dangit. I'm trying to get up early and stay up all day but I just can't do it yet. I increased my thyroid med to full-strength yesterday so I'm expecting to be back to normal in a week or so.

I've been slathering moisturizer on my face and the psoriasis is starting to heal. (this is part of the thyroid deficiency - dry skin)

  Its on my cheeks, right below my eyes. I did have a little bit on my forehead but its gone already. I also have some on my arms and legs. This happened last year too, and is by far the most painful symptom of hypothyroidism. The most annoying symptom? Thinning hair. At least I know it will grow back in.  (gosh, I sure need to put on some makeup...)

I'm Cancer Free Today!

Had my 1-year annual body scan today, after being off my thyroid medication since the end of September (part of the annual withdrawal in preparation for the body scan).

I am cancer-free! I am a SURVIVOR!

Its weird, they told me they probably got it all last year but I didn't feel like a survivor then. I didn't realize how much I'd been waiting to hear the words that it was gone.

Now I go back on my thyroid medicine, build up the dosage, and will be feeling good again in just a couple weeks. 

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still knitting socks! I love Ravelry. I so enjoy the monthly challenges in the Sock Knitters Anonymous mini-group. If you don't already belong to Ravelry and you're a knitter or crocheter, you really should do yourself a favor and sign up. Its free, and its the best place (in my opinion) to go for advice, help, patterns and ideas.

        

     

Also, still making quilts, though not as avidly as B.S.K. (before sock knitting). My quilt group has been putting together our tumbler charm quilts - we swapped charms for 1 year and then started putting our tops together last month. I finished mine up in November since I was off-work with gall-bladder surgery and waiting to have my body scan. Its ready to be loaded and quilted. I really, really like this quilt top. Its almost like an "I-Spy" quilt. I think I'll send it to the kids in Alaska when its done.

They have a new house, and it would make a perfect "I'm sick and laying on the couch" quilt. (I mean, it would be interesting to lay there and look at all the different patches.... not that it is worthy of being barfed on) (and not that they get sick or anything.... oh, heck. you know what I mean!)

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By the way, I don't knit, sew, crochet, or do any textile type things for profit.

Now, With Knitting!

I've got several things to share today. (finally, you say)

First, I had an appointment with the oncologist today, AND a body scan at the hospital, all on the same day. (minor miracle accomplished) The doctor visit went well; had labwork as usual and discussed the thyroid medicine dosage. I'm in the 2nd week of a 4 week dosage increase. The doctor agreed I should be having more good days now, and to call for a release when I feel ready to return to work. He thinks that should be around the end of the 3rd week of thyroid medicine, but its ultimately my decision. So, I'm going to start adding activity to my daily routine and see how I tolerate that - obviously if I'm worn out at the end of the day, I'll have overdone it. I see the doctor again in 8 weeks to check the medicine dosage.

Second, the body scan went well; it took 45 minutes of waiting and another 45 minutes to do the scan. I won't have to do this again for 6 months. 

Here's how my scar is looking 7-8 weeks post surgery:

  Not bad, huh?  I use Mederma on the scar 2x daily.

Third, I've been off seafood (high iodine content) since late September. I was missing eating fish at one of our local restaurants (they do an awesome lemon grilled fish filet), but I've also had a hankering for shrimp. Today the doctor told me it was ok to eat seafood so we had lunch at Red Lobster, where I had a tasty shrimp dinner. Yummy! Me happy!

Fourth, we had a few spare minutes to stop in at Joann's for "supplies". LOL yeah, I got a couple packs of sewing machine needles, a 60mm OLFA rotary cutter blade (I have a useless 65mm Fiskar blade that I got at wal-mart last week - why aren't they the same size? grrr...gotta return it) and I also picked up some funny yarn to make a scarf for Tara. She's been asking Kevin to ask me to make her a new scarf. She wears a black pea coat and has been wearing a brown scarf I gave her a couple years ago. Here's what we have so far:

Its Joann's Sensations Sprinkles, on sale this week for $3.99 per skein, 87 yards of nylon fiber per skein, 18 stitches wide (4") garter stitch on size 10 needles. I got 3 skeins, so it will be that long... I'm calling it the Marshmallow Scarf. And let me be the first to acknowledge how DUMB it is to knit something in fiddly white fiber when I have 2 black dogs. But its a fun little thing to work on - this is about an hour's worth of knitting. I'll probably finish it this week. I also picked up a couple skeins of something called Angel Hair that is a wool/acrylic blend, but that will remain under wraps until the knitting has commenced with that yarn. I have another scarf for Tara up my sleeve, this one with ribs...

Fifth, a beautiful day. It was 75 degrees and sunny today, and not windy. What a wonderful day to sit in the yard and knit while the dogs ran and played. They don't make many of those for December in these parts. I'll take what I can get! 

You Are Saved From My Ranting

You all have no idea how lucky you are. I'm not in possession of kind temperament today; neither do I have the energy to expound on the atrocity and injustice that has pissed me off. 

(Don't believe me? Google Baby Grace )

I have to go back next week and have another body scan. I'm trying to get it coordinated with the followup doctor appointment, so we don't have to make that trip two times in one week. I was really tired yesterday - I slept most of the day.

We went out for a bite last night; I got a Philly Steak sandwich that tasted SO good. I haven't really cared for a lot of food since this thyroid stuff started, and the hospital food was icky this time, so much that it still nauseates me to think about it. But every so often, I get something that tastes REALLY good. Its so weird, so strange, that a person can get excited over a freshly baked potato or a toasted roast beef sandwich. You just have NO idea. 

Treatment is Done!

I'm done with my treatment. I went into the hospital on Friday morning, and got the radioactive iodine pill right after lunch.

The room had two steel screens blocking the bed area from the door. The nurses came in once per twelve hour shift, to check my vital signs and to bring my regular meds. They brought me a ton of linens and a couple of bins for laundry and trash. I was told to shower frequently and change my bedding, as the radioactivity leaves the body through the pores and the digestive system. So I took a shower and put on clean sheets and gown every 8 hours. They also brought me a tub full of juices and sodas; I was told to drink lots of fluids so the radioactivity would pass through my system faster. My food came in on styrofoam and the remains went into sealed trashbags in the garbage bin.

I did a lot  of crossword puzzles and watched college football.  I did get two good nights' sleep! I was released about noon today.  I'll get my thyroid medicine filled tomorrow and go back for a checkup and another body scan in about  a week.  The first thing I did when I got home? Took my dogs to bed for a nap. They were pretty happy to see me! 

Another Delay

You will see that its Wednesday and I'm not in the hospital.  My treatment was postponed until Friday, because the remodel on the oncology floor wasn't finished as of yesterday. (I think its because they realized there was a holiday this week... and didn't want to staff for it, but I tend to think in paranoia at times...)

I still had a doctor's appointment and labs at 8:00 am on Tuesday, because he needed to see me and discuss the treatment before I go in.  After all the rigamarole about home treatment  vs. inpatient treatment, they are actually giving me a dosage that is for inpatient-only (150 millicuries).  So all the discussions with the nurses etc. were wasted breath and worry for naught.  See, that is the frustrating part of this thing, or maybe its just me.  It seems like since I started going to the cancer center and getting ready for treatment, its been a big run-around.  I know its probably my attitude more than any lack of knowledge on their part, because I'm frustrated about the waiting and testing and can't do anything about it. And that breaks my own personal rule, which is "if you can't do something to change it right now, then it is not your problem to fix". So there you have it, I've been letting it get to me, even though I know better.

Did I mention that I will be in the hospital until Monday? And that I can't take anything with me? Actually, what the nurse told me was that "everything that goes into the treatment room will have to stay when you're discharged" because it becomes radioactive and must be disposed of accordingly.  I can bring paperback books and magazines, travel-sized personal grooming items, and old clothing like socks and undies that I would not mind throwing away.  I can wear the hospital gowns and footcovers.  So I guess I'll pack an old toothbrush and socks and take a pile of magazines and a couple of paperback books. I'm glad I hadn't downloaded the games I play from the internet!  (Yahoo games - Bookworm and Bejeweled) I had also thought I might organize my embroidery design files and work on digital pictures, but that won't happen since the laptop isn't going with me on this trip.

I did something yesterday that I haven't done in a LONG time.  I bought fabric.  Back in the summer, Moda introduced a line called "Chez Moi" that was so yummy and beautiful I could barely stand to not buy it. Since I couldn't think of something to make from that collection, I held off, knowing that if I changed my mind I'd probably have difficulty finding it.  (why is that? used to be, you'd see fabrics from a collection for a year or so, and now - poof! - they are gone within a couple of months. I think the manufacturers don't print the quantities of yardage as in the past, and when its gone, its history.)  Anyway, I did find a couple patterns a few days ago that were screaming "Chez Moi!" so I got on the internet and started searching.  Yay! I found some at several different places, including one that still had the FQ bundles. I also found yardage of the brown tone-on-tone that worked so well with the collection for sashing.  And I found some yardage on sale at another site!  So I think I've ordered enough to make a quilt and a pair of matching pillowcases, and possibly have enough left for a third project, such as a neckroll pillow or a bag.

Do you ever face that dilemma? You fall in love with a fabric collection and regret not snapping it up when its widely available? I don't often want to make a quilt from a coordinated collection, as I really prefer scrappy quilts, but once in awhile a collection does speak to me. And its not just the decision to buy a FQ bundle - you have to commit to yardage for borders and/or sashing for an unknown project (or decide that you will use Moda Marbles or muslin or Amish Black for needed yardage when you actually get around to making something...) So, what do y'all do? 

And of course, the weather.... our beautiful warm sunny days are over for awhile. We had our first major cold front move in this morning; its in the 40s and windy, with snow predicted Thursday and Friday. (I might as well be in the hospital - its going to be a crappy weekend) How come the 40s were refreshing in Alaska in September and are just darned cold now? Partly, its the wind. And partly, its the record-setting 80's from yesterday that make it seem so wrong.

I want to thank y'all for the continuing posts and e-mails of encouragement. It really makes my day when I hear from y'all.  (((hugs))) Thank you, and happy Thanksgiving. 

Finally - Scheduled for the Treatment

The nurses at the cancer center have been playing  phone tag with me for the past few days.  They always call when I'm sleeping... because I'm always sleeping these days.  (Hypothyroid fatigue)

Anyway. I am going into the hospital for the radioactive iodine treatment on Tuesday the 20th. It will take 2 or 3 days.  We have friends who will take care of Joe on Thanksgiving day. Isn't that wonderful?

This past week or so has been the most difficult part of this whole cancer thing. I've been so tired and cold. Tuesday the 13th we went to the hospital for the body scan (AKA Thyroid Uptake Study). Of all the research I've done, this was something I didn't read about beforehand. Therefore, I did not know that it was a 6 hour/24 hour test. I arrived and was given the 3 radioactive iodine capsules to take.  Then I was told to return to the hospital in 6 hours to be scanned.  Yep, it takes time for the iodine to be absorbed by the thyroid cells that are left in the body.  DUH. So, we went to World Market and bought wine, Lowe's and bought pinion wood for the fireplace and some CF lightbulbs, ate good mexican food, and went to Joann's for Peltex for the postcards I make. We also killed some time in Barnes & Noble (got 2 magazines). We made the best of the 6 hour wait, though it would have been nice to know about this beforehand.

Then, we had to go back Wednesday afternoon for the second scan. These scans only take about 25 minutes and are totally painless, but the 1 hour drive to the hospital, and of course the hour drive home, done so often have been wearing me out. I was having a stomach ache, and thought it was a side effect of the iodine. We got a bite to eat after the scan and headed home. And, I got sick in the car on the way home, really sick.  When we got home, my precious saint of a husband cleaned up the car while I cleaned myself up and collapsed in bed. I was praying that I would die quickly. 

The next morning, Joe called me from the coffee shop and told me the stomach flu was going around. There were so many calling in sick that the coffee shop was cancelling lunch service, and word had it hitting the schools hard too. I slept almost the whole day Thursday, and today I'm finally feeling a little more normal, though I still slept most of this afternoon.

Also, I have to say how blessed I feel to have this type of cancer. It is treatable and curable. My experience of the past two days leaves me in awe of all the people who travel to the hospital or cancer center in Amarillo daily for chemotherapy, for weeks at a time, and deal with the sickness on a daily basis, and the long hours spent in the car. I am not at all confident that I could cope with that. 

A Post Without A Title

I got word today that I'll have the diagnostic body scan next Tuesday (13th).  They use a different radioactive isotope than what they'll do the treatment with; it has a much shorter half-life and will be out of my body in a matter of hours.  The reason they do this is to identify how much thyroid tissue is still in my body, theoretically to determine how much radioactive iodine to use in the treatment.  They really have already decided to use a big dose, similar to carpet bombing (LOL) but they have to do the body scan first.  And I'll be having annual body scans for the next few years, so... anyway. At least we're doing something, finally. 

Here's my "scrappy mountain majesties" quilt top:

I need to find some border fabric.  There is obviously potential for this to be a seam-matching nightmare; if you make one of these, follow the pressing instructions and PIN the rows on every seam.

And on November 8, Joe's birthday (he's 52 today!) here is one of the roses on a bush I planted this year:

Its a climber called "Crimson Sky".  I planted two of them next to the sewing barn.  *smile*  Roses in November!!!

Miscellaneous Musings

Y'all have no idea how much I appreciate all the comments and encouragement... thank you so much.  ((hugs))

I had an appointment at the regional cancer center yesterday, to meet the doctor who will handle my radioactive iodine treatment.  It was nice, though I didn't hear anything new.  Dr. Sharp explained the process of staging the cancer, went over the pathology reports, and talked about the treatment.  My TSH level was 19 on Monday, up from 10 the week before. (my pre-surgery TSH was 0.1)  It needs to be around 30 before they can do the body scan, so we're hoping that next week's bloodwork will hit the magic number.  The body scan will show any remaining thyroid cells in the body, and then we will schedule the radioactive iodine treatment which will blast those cells and kill them.  Hopefully, I'll be getting that treatment in a couple of weeks.

A couple of weekends ago, we went over to a little town nearby for their "fall foliage festival".  Its an annual event, with a lot of activities.  Unfortunately the foliage hadn't changed yet, as the daily temps were still in the high 80s. We still had a great time. We walked across the old bridge over the river, went out to the nearby lake and walked on the nature trails, went to the quilt show and the craft show, visited the museum, and ate at one of the local sandwich shops. 

The old bridge:

on the nature trail:

As my TSH level rises, I've started feeling some fatigue and lack of focus.  (common symptoms of hypothyroid)  I've been doing a little bit of sewing and a lot of reading and napping. I recently saw a quick and easy quilt pattern on Bonnie Hunter's website, called Scrappy Mountain Majesties, and decided to give it a try:

its a really easy pattern using 32 light 8" squares and 32 dark 8" squares.  I've got my blocks made and ready to set into a quilt top.

Last weekend I sewed with my girlfriends and we were discussing old UFOs.  Two of us had been in a log cabin class several (10+) years ago and neither of us finished our quilts.  We all decided to bring an old UFO to work on next month, so I'm bringing this:

 

I had so forgotten about this quilt project.  It was a very nice surprise to find that everything is cut, and the blocks are ready for the last round of strips. All I have to do is take the strips that have the gold star triangles on them and sew them to the blocks.  There will be gold stars at the block intersections when its all set in the quilt top.  Its a variation of the "Colorado Log Cabin", the original design is by Judy Martin.  I'm thinking these two projects are simple enough to call  "mindless sewing" and not mess them up... I hope I'm right!

Fighting Back

I'll have to admit, that statement is somewhat misleading.  I'm not having to "fight" this thing too hard.  My first surgery was on the 4th of October, and lasted about 4-1/2 hours.  The doctors decided to remove the tumor first, and stopped when they got finished with that.   The ENT surgeon told me the next day that it was the largest thyroid tumor he had ever removed, in 40 years of performing neck surgeries.  It was about the size of my fist, approximately 12 cm.  I cannot imagine how long it must have been growing there.  Anyway, I didn't really have pain following the surgery, though I was on a morphine pump for a day and a half that was automatically giving me a little bit of morphine every so often.  I asked them to please take it off or de-program it or whatever, because it kept making me fall asleep.  Once I got the morphine stopped, I was totally alert and had no trouble getting out of bed, walking the halls, showering, and using the restroom by myself. I went home from the hospital two days later, with just a single drain to take care of. I spent the weekend resting since my dogs were boarded.

The following Thursday, the 11th, the oncology surgeon removed my thyroid in a 2.5 hour surgery.  He extended the original incision about 5" further across my neck. I didn't have post-op morphine this time, still didn't need it, but I did have an anxiety attack and a headache that evening.  We both think it was from going more than 24 hrs without food and without my daily meds.  I got two Lortabs (hydrocodone) and was calm and pain-free within about 45 minutes.  It was basically the same routine for the second hospitalization - I was up walking the halls, eating, showering, etc. right away and  was discharged two days later (Thursday to Saturday).  Again, I had a restful weekend since the dogs were boarded.  Our boarding facility closes at noon on Saturdays so we didn't get home in time to pick the dogs up after I got out of the hospital either time. I didn't know until this Monday that the dogs stayed for free because I was in the hospital. Isn't that incredibly cool...

Joe has been awesome during this whole thing.  He was with me the whole time I was in the hospital, except to sleep at night. Anything I needed or wanted, he knew before I could ask for it.  He's making sure I take my meds, take walks, and get plenty of rest.  I could not ask for a better caregiver, or a better husband. He's given me funny cards, brought me sno-cones and snacks, and dressed my wounds. He's held my hand, massaged my legs, and kept me comfy.  Gotta love him!!!

So, here's the picture you've been waiting for:

It looks a lot worse than it is, there is a lot of bruising but it doesn't hurt.  I'm already using Mederma on it to lessen the scarring, but the doctors said it will fade almost entirely anyway.  The whole thing is about 12" long and goes 3/4 of the way around my neck.

And for anyone interested in statistics, my cancer was staged as a 4A.  Five of the 20 lymph nodes removed did have thyroid cancer cells in them. With most cancers, a 4A is pretty serious, but thyroid cancer is different.  Regardless of the extent of metastasis, the treatment is the same. After a couple of weeks without thyroid hormone, you're ready to receive the radioactive iodine treatment.  Its a mega dose of radioactive iodine, which seeks out the thyroid cancer cells throughout the body and kills them.  For a couple of days after the treatment, you have to be isolated until the radioactivity is gone from your system.  Then I'll start thyroid hormone medication and will be back to normal. 

I really have it pretty easy....  and I feel extremely lucky.  :)

Here's a picture of me in Alaska with my spiffy new haircut:

pic of Mr. Scooba standing in the ocean off the Kenai peninsula:

the kids at Exit Glacier near Seward:

We had a fantastic time in Alaska - it was one of the best trips we have ever taken.  I'll post more pictures in a few days - it seems like we've been consumed with this cancer crap ever since we got home from Alaska.  Now that we have the surgeries behind us, I'm starting to go through my pictures and enjoying them...

Here's a picture of me and Mr. Scooba at Kevin & Tara's wedding:

I love this picture, don't we look snazzy!  And we both really were that happy!

Kids and the wedding cake:

Tara baked a cake for their 1 month anniversary, and used their cake topper on it:

One more Alaska picture - moose in Kincaid park:
 

More later...